I need a kids boarding school in california. Please help.?

My son is out of control. He is 8 1/2 and his defiance is only getting worse. (Please no criticism. This is tearing us apart and we have tried Everything!... therapy, doctors, behaviour cles for him & us. I have sent him to therapy for years and he is so defiant I cannot even keep childcare so I can work, and I am so stressed he is making me sick... ulcers, stress headaches everyday. Life with im is a constant battle.) I no longer can continue like this so I need to find him a boarding school (preferably theutic or mlitary). I cannot seem to find one that takes kids his age. Please send me links to websites. (And, no, his dad is not an option because he is absent from his life & a bi-polar drug addict. And, no, none of my family will take him. He is too much for them too. We really love him but the constant fight just to function due to his behaviour is too much for everyone.) Thank you for your help.